Alzheimer's Blog
This has been an eventful day. As I was working today, I got the pleasure of going to an airport to pick up a 87 yr old male with history of dementia along with pneumonia, chronic low b/p going to a nursing / rehab home. I was glad that I got to pick him up because I notice that a lot of people don't know how to talk or act with a person with this terrible disease. You know the saying, this is your space and this is mine, but I know how to have compassion and go into their space with a hug or a kiss on the cheek to make them feel at home. It was so good to see his daughter get off the plane with him. But my heart really jumped for joy when I saw his wife and son waiting at the nursing home for him. I hope that rehab happens fast and he can go home soon. Nothing against nursing homes, but I find that people seem to lose all hope when they find them selves there. People need a purpose in life to go on.
It is New Years Eve, and the moon is so big and beautiful. I am lucky enough that I don't have to work until midnight tonight, and am looking forward to spending the evening with my kids and husband.
A good point tonight is to try to help your loved one with Alzheimer's to find a purpose to live. It could be as simple as washing the dishes or folding the towels. I use to keep a sink full of plastic dishes in soapy water for my father in law to wash when ever he felt like it. I also kept a basket of towels ready for him to fold at any given time. Be creative, and remember, be an angel and practice random acts of kindness. Let me know if I am helping you at all.
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock & Pub.
www.mariefostino.com
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Alzheimer's Blogging:
I don't know if anything I write is being read by anyone. But if it is, I hope I am helping you out. It is hard to believe that it will be New Years Eve in just a few hours. I am working on the ambulance tomorrow, but in the late evening I will be getting off of work and will get to spend watching the New Year come in with my husband and a couple of my kids and grandchildren. Now it is time to make New Year Resolutions. It is time to organize and list our objects of desire. Maybe it will be a new job, or maybe a new addition to the family.
I like to go through my pictures, and remember the fun times I had with my father-in-law. The times he would come over and bring pizza and play board games with us until we turned on the TV just before midnight, and count in the New Year.
I just want to share again the three things I think are most important if you are a care giver.
1) Find a good support group. Where ever you live, just check out Alzheimer's Association, and find the map, which you click on and than find your city and they will have a list of support groups.
2) Respite Care is very important. If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of your loved one. There is all kinds of Respite care. They have adult day cares that you can drop them off for a few hours of the day. There is Nursing homes that will take Respite care for weekends or how ever long you may need the break. You may even find someone to come to your home and give you a break.
3) Hospice Care is very important as your loved one reaches the end of life. They can give you the moral support you need, and give you what you may need to help keep your loved one in a comfort state during their last hours.
Please let me know if I have helped you at all, or if I can do anything to help.
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com
I don't know if anything I write is being read by anyone. But if it is, I hope I am helping you out. It is hard to believe that it will be New Years Eve in just a few hours. I am working on the ambulance tomorrow, but in the late evening I will be getting off of work and will get to spend watching the New Year come in with my husband and a couple of my kids and grandchildren. Now it is time to make New Year Resolutions. It is time to organize and list our objects of desire. Maybe it will be a new job, or maybe a new addition to the family.
I like to go through my pictures, and remember the fun times I had with my father-in-law. The times he would come over and bring pizza and play board games with us until we turned on the TV just before midnight, and count in the New Year.
I just want to share again the three things I think are most important if you are a care giver.
1) Find a good support group. Where ever you live, just check out Alzheimer's Association, and find the map, which you click on and than find your city and they will have a list of support groups.
2) Respite Care is very important. If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of your loved one. There is all kinds of Respite care. They have adult day cares that you can drop them off for a few hours of the day. There is Nursing homes that will take Respite care for weekends or how ever long you may need the break. You may even find someone to come to your home and give you a break.
3) Hospice Care is very important as your loved one reaches the end of life. They can give you the moral support you need, and give you what you may need to help keep your loved one in a comfort state during their last hours.
Please let me know if I have helped you at all, or if I can do anything to help.
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Merry Christmas,
My father in law died June 13, 2004. I have so many wonderful memories of dad at Christmas time. I remember when I first married into the family, and Jimmy's family was Catholic and mine was Baptist. So we would go to my Christmas Eve service and than go to Jimmy's family to have fish and noodles for our meal. As we started to have a family, my in-laws would always have Santa Clause come over on Christmas Eve to give a gift to their grandchildren. Than this terrible disease came and took over my father in laws mind. Let me share with you an entry from my journal:
December 28, 2002
Picture this, in a bedroom with an adjoining bath; music blasting, loud talking and five women in their underwear, ironing clothes, fixing each other's hair, gossiping, joking, laughing, putting on makeup and not letting any men in the room.
I suddenly realized how much I missed my family--the mess, the noise, the yelling, the hugging, the helping. What a way to start Christmas Eve.
Before I moved here in August, all my kids lived with me except my oldest daughter Kristina. Then my second daughter, Jennifer, and her daughter Adias, moved to Oklahoma. My son, Erik, stayed in Decatur to be with his girlfriend. My forth child, Jessica, moved to Virgina for college and my daughter, Regina ( still in high school), moved with us. So the "empty nest" feeling was hard upon me. Having them all home for Christmas made me miss them even more and realize how precious they all are.
This was the slowest and most wonderful week of the year 2002.
We spent Christmas Day at home alone, if you call then people in a house "alone." We went to the movies and saw Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers. The next day we went to the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago. Of course Dad was with us and we all had a great time. I bathed him on the night before so he didn't have to take a bath that morning. It was hustle and bustle in the house with so many people and only two bathrooms.
I told Dad we were going for a ride and he was good with that. He went willingly into the car and seemed happy. At the museum we had a little wait before we were able to rent a wheelchair; Dad had became impatient due to all the noise and crowds. But the kids were having a great time and once we got started, they took turns pushing his wheelchair. Each one would take time to talk to Dad, pointing things out for him or just saying, "I love you." He smiled each time they offered a little extra attention.
The museum had an area lined with Christmas trees from all over the world. We walked down the aisle and Dad kept telling us to , "Hurry now." But when we got to the section with the old-fashioned cars and fire engines, he seemed to calm down and enjoy himself. Before we left, we stopped at the old ice cream parlor for a treat. There was a long line, and Dad lost patience while we waited, but brightened up once he got his ice cream.
On the 27th of December we had an Open House. I thought this might be a good opportunity for Dad to see his family and some of his old friends. I'd discovered that many people were uncomfortable around Dad now, and they found many reasons not to stop by. I decided that an Open House, with Dad surrounded by his family, would make their visit a little less uncomfortable. These people all remembered Dad before he was sick and didn't want to see him in his current state. In any case, we all had a wonderful time. Dad even danced for everyone.
The next day the kids began to leave but that evening we went to a family reunion on my mother-in-law's side of the family. We had a great time.
My children are certainly getting an education on Alzheimer's. They have seen their Grandfather show the ugly side when he gets upset and acts like a child, fighting, kicking and swearing. But they also can see his nice side, when Dad tells them he loves them or asks them how they are doing. They are learning to be caregivers, not letting him get up with out his walker or fetching him drinks when he asks. They have learned to be patient when he asked the same thing over and over again.
They can't believe how he doesn't sleep at night, as they hear me get up repeatedly and put him back to bed. They also had time to enjoy him. We did karaoke and, while Dad didn't sing, he did get up and dance. They made him a part of the family, just as if he always was like this from the beginning.
Remember, life is a gift fro God, so please obey His will and enjoy His gift. Live each five minutes like it is your last.
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A. Rock Pub., Co.
http://www.mariefostino.com/
My father in law died June 13, 2004. I have so many wonderful memories of dad at Christmas time. I remember when I first married into the family, and Jimmy's family was Catholic and mine was Baptist. So we would go to my Christmas Eve service and than go to Jimmy's family to have fish and noodles for our meal. As we started to have a family, my in-laws would always have Santa Clause come over on Christmas Eve to give a gift to their grandchildren. Than this terrible disease came and took over my father in laws mind. Let me share with you an entry from my journal:
December 28, 2002
Picture this, in a bedroom with an adjoining bath; music blasting, loud talking and five women in their underwear, ironing clothes, fixing each other's hair, gossiping, joking, laughing, putting on makeup and not letting any men in the room.
I suddenly realized how much I missed my family--the mess, the noise, the yelling, the hugging, the helping. What a way to start Christmas Eve.
Before I moved here in August, all my kids lived with me except my oldest daughter Kristina. Then my second daughter, Jennifer, and her daughter Adias, moved to Oklahoma. My son, Erik, stayed in Decatur to be with his girlfriend. My forth child, Jessica, moved to Virgina for college and my daughter, Regina ( still in high school), moved with us. So the "empty nest" feeling was hard upon me. Having them all home for Christmas made me miss them even more and realize how precious they all are.
This was the slowest and most wonderful week of the year 2002.
We spent Christmas Day at home alone, if you call then people in a house "alone." We went to the movies and saw Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers. The next day we went to the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago. Of course Dad was with us and we all had a great time. I bathed him on the night before so he didn't have to take a bath that morning. It was hustle and bustle in the house with so many people and only two bathrooms.
I told Dad we were going for a ride and he was good with that. He went willingly into the car and seemed happy. At the museum we had a little wait before we were able to rent a wheelchair; Dad had became impatient due to all the noise and crowds. But the kids were having a great time and once we got started, they took turns pushing his wheelchair. Each one would take time to talk to Dad, pointing things out for him or just saying, "I love you." He smiled each time they offered a little extra attention.
The museum had an area lined with Christmas trees from all over the world. We walked down the aisle and Dad kept telling us to , "Hurry now." But when we got to the section with the old-fashioned cars and fire engines, he seemed to calm down and enjoy himself. Before we left, we stopped at the old ice cream parlor for a treat. There was a long line, and Dad lost patience while we waited, but brightened up once he got his ice cream.
On the 27th of December we had an Open House. I thought this might be a good opportunity for Dad to see his family and some of his old friends. I'd discovered that many people were uncomfortable around Dad now, and they found many reasons not to stop by. I decided that an Open House, with Dad surrounded by his family, would make their visit a little less uncomfortable. These people all remembered Dad before he was sick and didn't want to see him in his current state. In any case, we all had a wonderful time. Dad even danced for everyone.
The next day the kids began to leave but that evening we went to a family reunion on my mother-in-law's side of the family. We had a great time.
My children are certainly getting an education on Alzheimer's. They have seen their Grandfather show the ugly side when he gets upset and acts like a child, fighting, kicking and swearing. But they also can see his nice side, when Dad tells them he loves them or asks them how they are doing. They are learning to be caregivers, not letting him get up with out his walker or fetching him drinks when he asks. They have learned to be patient when he asked the same thing over and over again.
They can't believe how he doesn't sleep at night, as they hear me get up repeatedly and put him back to bed. They also had time to enjoy him. We did karaoke and, while Dad didn't sing, he did get up and dance. They made him a part of the family, just as if he always was like this from the beginning.
Remember, life is a gift fro God, so please obey His will and enjoy His gift. Live each five minutes like it is your last.
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A. Rock Pub., Co.
http://www.mariefostino.com/
Friday, December 11, 2009
Merry Christmas Everyone,
This is such a wonderful time of year. I know it is hard to enjoy this time when you are juggling work, a loved one with Alzheimer's, and home life. Take a little advice. First take a deep breath and try to relax. When you are with your loved one with Alzheimer's don't make it a loud experience. Keep the music low, and pace your self. Try to remember what your loved one use to do to make the holiday special. Don't be upset if they don't remember who you are, or what Christmas is. Just be there for them, and show them the love and compassion they once showed you. Remember that they did not ask for this disease, and don't even know that they have it now.
Enjoy the time with them, and than don't feel bad that you are able to enjoy it differently with your family. Keep it special for your children, and grandchildren. Explain to them how much fun the holidays were when your parent didn't have the disease and maybe even keep up the old traditions. Life is what you make it.
This is when we celebrate the birth of our Lord. I am so happy for this opportunity, and for the freedom to do this. Merry Christmas!
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
www.mariefostino.com
This is such a wonderful time of year. I know it is hard to enjoy this time when you are juggling work, a loved one with Alzheimer's, and home life. Take a little advice. First take a deep breath and try to relax. When you are with your loved one with Alzheimer's don't make it a loud experience. Keep the music low, and pace your self. Try to remember what your loved one use to do to make the holiday special. Don't be upset if they don't remember who you are, or what Christmas is. Just be there for them, and show them the love and compassion they once showed you. Remember that they did not ask for this disease, and don't even know that they have it now.
Enjoy the time with them, and than don't feel bad that you are able to enjoy it differently with your family. Keep it special for your children, and grandchildren. Explain to them how much fun the holidays were when your parent didn't have the disease and maybe even keep up the old traditions. Life is what you make it.
This is when we celebrate the birth of our Lord. I am so happy for this opportunity, and for the freedom to do this. Merry Christmas!
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
www.mariefostino.com
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Hope all of you had a great Thanksgiving. Mine started with a 15 hr car ride to OKC to be with all 5 of my children, their spouses and my 6 grandchildren. We all stayed at my daughter, Kristina's house. It was a little tight with only 3 bathrooms, 4 bedrooms and 17 people. But it was also great. We played games and had a lot of food. Making memories is what life is about. I have wonderful memories of when Joe was alive, and we had Thanksgiving with him. He traveled to see us all the time. We seemed to move all around the states, and whether we lived in Maryland, or Texas dad would come and spend the holidays with us. It was those memories that kept him alive when he had his Alzheimer's. I don't think to much of him while he had his disease, but I have wonderful memories of him when he came to visit us. Hope you can get past this diseases and remember your loved one they way they use to be. Remember that they are not themselves but it is the disease that has taken over.
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
