ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Today was an eventful day. My partner on the ambulance is a 25 yr old kid. Today was his wedding day. It was so beautiful to see him and his new bride say their vows, put sand in a jar, and have communion. I have done wedding pictures in the past, so I had to sneak to see what the photographer was doing. I was so impressed as I saw three women who had to be in their 70's & 80's getting their pictures taken with this couple. Yes they were grandparents and great aunts. And to me they looked so beautiful.

Such is life to marry young and get old together. I think of some of the people I pick up from nursing homes that have been married for 50 or 60 yrs and the stories they tell me. I love it. Isn't this what life is suppose to be about? Having a mate and growing old together? I have only been married for 35 yrs. I plan to harass my husband at least another 35 yrs if the Lord willing.

Alzheimer's does put a damper on this. My Aunt is 80 yrs old and her husband has Alzheimer's. She called the other day telling me that he is starting to get to hard for her to handle. Don't get me wrong. She said he is pleasant, but she can't keep up with the wet pants, wet sheets, and his getting lost in the house all the time. Plus she said that he won't let her out of his sight. I can't imagine how she is doing this at her age. This is the time her kids should be helping out more. Maybe they could come over and give her a break once in a while, or even take turns spending the night. Isn't that what life is all about, family helping family?

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

It has been a nice day on the ambulance today. We walked into a nursing home to see a lot of wheel chairs in a circle in the big living room with someone reading the paper to everyone there. Some were listening, and some were sleeping. As I walked to the nursing station I saw a women sitting in her wheel chair sitting in a corner by her self, talking to her self. Next we were to get a 69 yr old female that fell out of bed and they wanted her to have an x-ray. This patient did not want to go. I had to prove to the nursing home that she was with it, knew her name, birthday, where she lived and that I would be kidnapping if I took her against her will. So finally the nursing home decided to have a portable x-ray to come to faculty to take her x-ray.

Next I have a 82 yr old male who has a permanent Foley cath and it is leaking, so he wants a doctor to put in a new one. He does have cancer, and swollen ankles. Walks real slow, but such a nice man with such a great personality. Took his vitals and his pulse which was only 43 bpm. So I did what I usual do, IV, ECG monitor, pulse ox. He took it all like a trooper. Only I was disappointed when the hospital didn't seem to take his pulse seriously. I am hoping that the doctor will look at more than his cath.

I don't remember anyone telling me that it hurts to get old. I always grew up thinking that when I got old I would retire and see the world. I never thought about your health keeping you down. Remember that it is important to exercise, eat healthy, and keep your mind going so that you can enjoy these golden years.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

Well I have the last couple days off from working, so I have been baby sitting my grandchildren. (one of my favorite things to do) I am trying to potty train my 2 yr old granddaughter. She has figured out that if she wants off the potty chair she has to pee in it, but if I don't make her sit on it, she can't figure out yet how it feels when you have to go. Also I have my 9 month old who is crawling all over the place.

This brings back memories when my daughter Kristina came to town for my son's wedding and brought her baby boy. He was only a couple of months old and we were not sure how Dad was going to react. Dad just sat there watching this child as we all cooed all over him and when he would cry and we would take care of him. Kristina showed Damien to Dad and put him in his lap. Dad stayed very still while holding Damien, smiling. For those few moments Dad seemed like a different person. We tried to explain to Dad that Kristina was his grandchild and that the baby belonged to her, so Damien was hid great grand child. Dad would smile and nod his head but I'm sure he did not understand what I was telling him. Finally he looked up and put his arms forward, trying to let us know that we should take the baby now. It hurts to know that Dad will never got to enjoy his great grandchildren.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

I went to the bank today and thought of my father in law. He always had money on him. He was real generous, like when times were hard, he would leave money on the kitchen counter or come over with grocery's. When we moved in with him with his Alzheimer's he was afraid that he was not getting his checks anymore. He would show me his wallet, and ask me where his money went so we gave him $300.00. One day he actually lost his wallet with the money and his drivers license. He was real upset so we had to get some fake money that really looked like real money. It was hard but we actually found some. So we gave him $300.00 worth of fake money and he was real happy. The day care center loved the fake money. They said he wanted to pay for lunch and they didn't want to take his money until they noticed it was fake. The good news is we finally did find his wallet and his drivers license, but the money was still missing.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

Today I am babysitting a couple of my grandchildren. My grandson is only 9 months old. My granddaughter is a little over 2 yrs. old. We are in the process of trying to toilet train her. And she wants no part of it.

This reminds me when dad started having trouble using the bathroom. First he could not do the snap or zipper anymore which really frustrated him. I went out scouting for some dress pants with no zippers or snaps and that was a hard job. I didn't want to put him in sweat pants or nylon pants because he never wore clothes like that before and I was trying to keep him as normal as possible. At night I would walk him to the bathroom, pull down his pants and set him on the toilet. Than I would put depends on him so that he would not wet the bed. I was still trying to maintain a regular schedule, making him do simple things around the house. I guess I was fooling myself, but I hoped a routine would keep him with us a little longer mentally. He deserved what ever I could do to maintain quality of life. It wasn't long after that when I had to start him on depends during the day. They have some that pull up like underpants, and he didn't even know the difference. I hope this may help someone who is experiencing the same problem.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Picture this; It is one am in the morning and someone wakes you up to tell you it is time to go home. You are 67 yr old male and not even sure where you are at. I went to the hospital to pick up this patient, in the middle of the night. I was told this patient was agitated so the nursing home decided to send him in an ambulance to the hospital with directions to give him something to calm him down. When he got to the hospital he was sound asleep, and slept the whole time until we got there to wake him up to bring him back. As I looked over his medication list the second drug on there was aricept. Right away I knew he had Alzheimer's. The nurse came to give me a report and handed me a script for ativan when he gets aggravated. This lovely man had such a great smile as we tried to get him to stand up and walk over to our gurney. He did not understand what we wanted and with our help we got him seated and covered up with blankets. Than the nurse gave me a sheet of paper for the nursing center on how to take care of an Alzheimer's and Dementia patient. I found this a little humorous, since many families put their loved ones with this disease in these homes. Any response to this?

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press an Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Imagine this; In this nursing home I went to today, a little old lady, pretty white hair, was sitting in a chair that resembles a high chair only because of the tray that is locking her in place. She sits there rocking back and forth hard enough for her head to hit the back of the chair to make some noise. No one seems to notice her, and she does not speak. I was there for forty minutes and no one did anything to try and make her stop. No one talked to her to ask her if she is alright. No one called her name to tell her every thing is fine. It was as if she wasn't there. She looked lost, as she glanced around at everyone. My heart broke as I watched her sitting, and rocking looking for attention. She was probably in her 80's or 90's. She is a human being. She once was probably a mother, sister, and wife. She may at one time had a career. But now she is just an old lady locked in a adult high chair. Why have we forgotten our elderly?

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

There is not only a change with your loved one with Alzheimer's but you also will change. When my husband and I decided to take care of his dad, we made our decision quickly. We both gave our jobs a two weeks notice, put our house up for sale, and made our plans to move from Decatur to Palos Heights, Ill. A lot of people may think this was a very difficult decision, but to us this was the easiest decision we made.

This disease not only changed the mental behavior and personality of the stricken person but also the behavior of the caretaker. Some times it was extremely difficult to put up. For example, in the later stages of Alzheimer's the person will ask you "What time is it?" and/or "What day is it?" At first you answer him politely, and than he may ask you again in a few minutes the same question. So you answer him politely again. Then, maybe 10 minutes later he will ask you the same question again, and you remind yourself that this is the disease talking, not your loved one. In about 30 minutes he will ask you the same question again. Now you must be thinking, So what is the big deal? All he is doing is asking you a simple question. Maybe he has asked it a few several times but so what? Now try to picture this going on all day long, day after day, month after month. Do you think this could possibly get on some one's nerves? And that is only a small part of it.

I want you to know that you may be human and sometimes get angry. You won't mean it, but you can only take it so long before you will want to blow up. Some people can take it longer than others. For instance my husband blew up much faster than I did. Than regret, and shameful feelings begin. This is why it is so important to get respite care. Some times you may need a break. You should not be mad at your self for wanting a break. But you will be much happier with your situation after you get a break. Check out the phone book for adult day cares or call the nursing homes around you to see if they have respite care for a short period. Just a thought. Hope this helps you know that you are not alone.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Have you ever called 911 and wondered why sometimes the EMT's don't seem real friendly? Or you had a loved one being picked up from a nursing home or urgent care and the EMT seems a little quiet. In our EMS world we work lots of hours with little pay. We work weird hours, for instant, we will work 24 hrs on - 24 hrs off- 24 hrs on- 24 hrs off- 24 hrs on and than 4 days off. Than we get called in to work on our days off. So for instance, I worked 24 hrs on Thursday, 12 hrs on Friday and now I am on my 24 hrs today. I try to grab a nap or food when I can. It is hard to keep slim this way. hehe Well yesterday was a eventful day.

I got off my 24 hour shift and went on my way to the airport for a flight call. We loaded every thing on our plane and we had a 3 hr flight to California to pick up our patient. An ambulance was waiting for us, and in the hospital we found a 67 yr old female lying in the hospital bed in ICU. This poor lady had a trachea with a ventilator on breathing for her, a Foley, a line for her feces, a pic line, a peg tube for feedings, and wraps with on legs. Our job was to take her to Phoenix to a long term hospital, because most of her family lives in Phoenix. This was not an easy task. First to put her on our vent was an uncomfortable thing for her. When we would put her on it, she would give me a frown and I would ask her if she was alright and she would shake her head no. So than I would say are you breathing alright, and she would shake her head no. Our machines told us that she was breathing, good 02 sats, and good vitals. But this poor little lady was very unhappy. After about 2 hrs of convincing her that she would be alright we finally got on our way. We sheet lifted her to our gurney, put her on our ecg monitor, pulse ox, and our vent. I could see the fright in her face as we moved her into the ambulance. I tried my best to comfort her. We finally got her to the airplane and loaded her inside. It was a long 3 hr flight. We kept monitoring her, taking vitals, watching her monitor rate which was in first degree block with episodes of PVC's. Her blood pressure was slowly dropping, from 112 systolic to 94 systolic, and than back up to 105 systolic. She tried to sleep during the flight. But I would talk to her asking her how she was with yes and no answers and she would shake her head telling me she was coping.

I guess I am telling you this because this was a hard thing for a 67 yr old women to make who was not doing good, just because the family wanted her closer to them. She lived in California, and so did one daughter. The other two daughters lived in Phoenix.

As we landed this lovely lady was not responding to us. Her eyes were motionless. She would not wake up to any painful stimuli. Her vitals were still alright, but this was not a good thing. As our ground ambulance brought us to the new hospital her blood pressure dropped and her systolic was 88. My heart is breaking. She is in renal failure, had strokes, and vent dependent. I do not know if she has dementia, because she could not talk to me.

Please if your family member is very ill, and in the hospital, don't move them out of state because you want them closer to you. Wait until they are physically and medically ready to move.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

I am working on the ambulance today. It is very windy and really raining hard today. This is another reminder of Chicago weather. Man I miss the city of Chicago. The museums, Navy Pier, the Zoo, the beach, Sears Tower, and the wonderful food. No one has eaten good pizza until they have had it in Chicago. Than we heard that there is a tornado watch. Now I am reminded of Oklahoma.

Today I had a 93 yr old female whose 02 sats were 78% on room air and 92% on two liters of oxygen. She was so fragile, skin was so dry, I just wanted to empty a bottle of lotion on her. I was told she was there because of a hip fracture for pt/ot. This cute little lady could not tell me if she was in any pain or if she was having trouble breathing. She has dementia / Alzheimer's. We took her vitals, and did what we were suppose to do, and as we went outside we put our blue water repellent little blanket over her whole body and face to keep her from getting wet. She was so cute she just giggled. I was glad that I got to take this call. I love taking little old women who are lost in their mind and try to make them comfortable. Her family showed up at the hospital after we were there a few minutes. My partner and I got to show some random acts of kindness.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press an Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

Some of the signs of Alzheimer's is Memory Loss, Solving Problems, Difficulty Completing Daily Tasks at Home, and Confusion with Time and Place. I remember one day about a week after we moved into dad's home, we took a shopping trip to the store. Dad didn't want to go, so we left him at home. We thought it would be alright. We were gone for about an hour and a half. When we walked in I couldn't find dad. Than there he was, in the bathroom, with the top of the toilet tank off and water and feces in the bathroom sink and on the bathroom floor. Dad was real frustrated telling me he was trying to fix the toilet. It took some convincing, but I got him cleaned up and out of the bathroom, and than I cleaned the sink and toilet and mopped up the floor. Dad came by watching me telling me the toilet doesn't work, so I had to flush it and show him that it worked fine now.

It is so hard to see a loved one being so confused by this terrible disease. Dad has known how to fix a toilet for as long as I have known him. Yet that day he didn't know what he was doing. It hurt me to see him like that. Alzheimer's not only hurts the one you love but also hurts you. Please remember to get into a support group. Some times you need to vent, and only people who are dealing with what you are dealing with will understand. Also you could be the answer to someones prayers with a positive way to deal with the disease.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Phoenix Arizona is known for its sunny days and hot summers. I have never seen more beautiful sunrises and sunsets, well except in Hawaii. It has been unusual the last couple of days with rain. It has been raining on and off now for two days and the weather man states it will be raining a few more days. We really need the rain, but it is a luxury that we usually don't get.

As I sit here listening to the rain I think about a beautiful day in September 2002, when I took dad to the Chicago Zoo. I have not lived with him very long and I wanted to just enjoy some time with him. We already noticed that it was hard for him to walk very far, and already rented a wheel chair so I brought it with. It was so beautiful to see the city buildings outlining the zoo. Dad was enjoying the stroll at first but than he started to get crabby. He would say things like, "Lady, I hope you know what your are doing?" or "We have to get back." So I decided to get him some lunch and once he ate he was in a much better mood. I pushed him around some more and slowly worked on getting him interested in the animals. Then he had to go to the bathroom. With the help of a stranger we accomplished this deed. I took him across Lake Shore Drive to the beach and wheeled him down the whole strip. It was so beautiful to hear the waves and feel the wind against my face. Dad just sat and enjoyed the view and the ride until he had to go to the bathroom again. I walked him back to the zoo, only to discover that all the wheelchair-access bathrooms were closed. Dad was mad because I would not let him walk down stairs to go to a bathroom. He began yelling at me and telling me that he fought for our country and now he can't even find a bathroom. I got lucky and found a gentleman to push his wheel chair into a wooded area to let him get relief. After that he was calm again and forgot that incident ever happened. I drove him home and he took a nap in the car and didn't remember anything about the day.

What I have discovered is these memories keep dad alive. I lost dad to Alzheimer's but I keep the wonderful memories of the man he was always in my heart.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

January is a very busy month for us. At first it was my mothers birthday. Than I married Jimmy and my mother had to share her birthday month with my husband and his father. As the years went by I ended up having two children in January. Than as my children got married I have a son in law with his birthday in January.

My father in law had one of the best birthday presents a father would ever want to have. His first born was born on his birthday. So when Jimmy and I were first married, we all ways celebrated my father in laws and Jimmy's birthday together.

Today we celebrated the birthdays in the month of January. It is great to see my children get older, and to enjoy my husband still here with me as we enjoy the gift of life together. My father in law is missed though. It says in the Bible there is a time to live and a time to die. So death is a part of life that we have to accept. So I am so glad that I have wonderful memories of my father in law. I have albums of pictures with life as we knew it when we were young, and dad was himself, helping around the house, and visiting us no matter what state we moved to. It is those memories that keep us going. It is the memories of the end of days with my father in law that helps me try to make my children know how important it is to be close, to stay close, and to not depend on us forever. It also is a tale to tell how important to enjoy the gift of life NOW.

While you are morning your loved one that may have passed away from this terrible disease, please remember the good times. Remember that we can't have life without death. Remember life is a gift and we need to make the best of it. Every moment is special, it may be our last, so make it count.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

It is so amazing how the mind works. As long as I don't look into the mirror, or think about my age, I can keep up with my kids. So I worked 24 hrs on Thursday. On Friday morning when I got off at 7am I came home and went straight to my daughters house to help her pack and move into their new house. Went back to work on Saturday for 24 hrs. On Sunday I did take a hour and a half nap, missed Sunday School, but did make church and went straight to my daughters old house and helped clean it up for the new people to move in. Now I am sneezing, runny nose, and watery eyes. My mind let me keep up with my kids, with little and no sleep. But now my body is telling me, that I have to face consequences for my actions. I am not in my 20's or 30's any more and I do need my rest. UGH.

I think back to just a few years ago when I would be up all night with dad. I actually put a baby monitor in his room so I could hear when he got out of bed. I am a very light sleeper I guess because I had five children, and when I would hear the rustle of the sheets being torn away from the bed, I would be in his room before he was able to leave. One time he asked me how I knew he was up, because he was trying to be so quiet. Sometimes I would have my robe on and lay on his bed with him until I heard him snore, before I tiptoed back to my room.

The point is I was able to stay up with dad and not get sick, and now I am getting sick with out the proper sleep. I guess you can say that if you are older and taking care of a loved one with Alzheimer's it is important to take care of your self. If you get run down, bad cold, or just feel so worn out, how can you take care of them. Please try to get some respite care. Your time does not belong to you at the moment. You are to busy making sure that your loved one does not get hurt, and are safe.

I can go to sleep after this post, take some NyQuil and sleep the next twelve hours. Can you? Please put your health first and than your loved one. You both will be much happier.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Today as I work on my ambulance I am doing a lot of running from urgent cares and taking their patients to hospitals. I have had a lot of people in pain. I HATE pain. One lady was in so much abdominal pain and so dehydrated I could not find a vein in her arm or hand. But I found a great on her foot. And yes she got morphine for her pain. It is amazing how the brain works. You skin your knee, a message goes to your brain, and than you feel the pain. Now think of how your loved one with Alzheimer's brain works. They don't know who you are, or where they are, or how old they are. So how are they suppose to know if they are in pain.

I remember watching my father in law walk up and down the hall of his house. He would keep a hand on the wall, guiding himself and pray to Mother Mary. I wasn't sure at first why he was doing that. He really wasn't a religious man, or at least I had never seen him pray before. I did ask him if he was in pain, and he would tell me no. But his body language told me a lot about him. As I watched him get up and down from a chair, or listen to when he would pray, I figured out that it was when he was in so much pain. After taking him to a doctor I found out that the hip bone joint and the ball inside grew flat to each other, rubbing against each other when he walked. The doctor told me he was in a lot of pain.

Hope this helps you with your loved one. Be kind and practice random acts of kindness.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Co., Pub.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG

Today has been a very eventful day. One of my daughters was moving out of her home to another one and so we spent the whole day packing and moving everything to her new house. I was a little tired since I just had gotten off my 24 hr shift, and went straight to work with her. But it is such a great feeling to know that we have her all moved in. Now she has the fun part of putting everything away.

This brings me back to the past when we lived in Chicago, and my husband had gotten a job in Houston. My father in law was there, helping us pack and load up the truck. I learned a lot from him for example, it gets dirty behind the refrigerator and the floor needs to get swept and mopped, and how to lift up the top of the stove to clean out the grease that had managed to spill there.

That was not the only time he had helped us move. Once we lived in San Antonio and he drove up in a truck and helped me pack and load our furniture in it and brought us back to Chicago. My father in law showed us what family does for each other. He showed the love he had for us and his grandchildren. I do hope today I am passing that on to my children. So today was an eventful day of helping a family member move and show a lesson that we are always there when we are needed.

I guess you can say that is one of the reasons I took care of my father in law when we discovered he had Alzheimer's. I did not want him some place alone and scared. I wanted to try to give back to him some of the love that he had given us through his life. It was not an easy job, but I am sure that when he came to help me move in San Antonio, it was not easy moving me and five children.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Today has been a real busy day on my ambulance. Car accidents, urgent cares, and lethargic people. Today I have had people as young as 49 and as old as 69. Not one of them had Alzheimer's. It is such a strange disease, and just not fair as to who gets it. My father in law didn't finish high school, but he was so smart. He was a truck driver after serving the military. He could take a car engine apart and put it back together again, plus he was real handy around the house.

So the question is what causes Alzheimer's? Genetics play an important role. Off spring have a 50-50 chance of getting this terrible disease. Other risk factors is our life style. Diet, exercise, and mental stimulation help reduce the risk of cognitive decline and Alzheimer's disease.

So what are some things you can do to keep your mind active and sharp? Watch a movie, watch a ball game, work on cross word puzzles, play chess, do volunteer work, eat a healthy diet and include physical activity at least 30 minutes a day to increase blood flow to your brain.

If you think you may have a loved one with dementia/Alzheimer's I found a web site that tells you about an in home Alzheimer's screening.
http://www.hometestmed.com Check it out.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

I had discovered that, with Alzheimer's, dad's good moments were very important. He was not himself anymore (and would never be again) because his brain had "shorted" out. Frequently, he could not remember from one minute to the next what he said,did or was doing. Sometimes he could be real sweet, like when I got him dressed in the morning and gave him his coffee. But other times he could be real mean, mostly at sun downing, telling me off, being real short with me and sometimes raising his hands to me.

Last night was an eventful night on the ambulance, and made me think of dad when he was in one of his bad times. We got a call around 300 am for a 92 yr old women who was short of breath. The nursing home had oxygen on her by a nasal cannula, which she kept taking off. Her pulse was high and her breathing was fast. She was not happy that we wanted to take vitals, hated how the blood pressure squeezed her arm, and didn't like the mask I put on her face with albuteral SVN to help her breath. She looked at me and said "If there is a God he will let you hurt like I hurt, no more, no less. And if I could I would get a gun and shoot you."

My heart went out to her. Picture yourself in her shoes. In the ambulance I was reading her paperwork which said she had a fractured hip, so it hurt her when we sheet lifted her to our gurney and to the hospital bed. Next she is on medication for her dementia/Alzheimer's, so you know she has no idea what is going on. All she knows is that two people came in the middle of the night, picked her up from her bed and took her out into the cold night. Now let me assure you that we did introduce ourselves to her, and tucked blankets around her before we went out side.

But she is confused, and all alone, with no knowledge of what is going on. I don't know her, so I don't know the nice moments she has. But since my father in law had both good and bad moments, I am taking for granted she does also. Have patience with your loved one with Alzheimer's. It is hard to put yourself in their shoes. It is also a very hard job to take care of them every day. May God Bless You.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

Someone sent this to me over my e-mail. This is such a cute little song. The question is, would you consider this forgetfulness, dementia, or Alzheimer's. After you watch this tell me what you think. http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=7lSliucgygc


Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG:

I remember one evening when dad was going through his sun downers. He was of course confused as to where he was and what he was doing. He was asking us to take him home, and of course we told him he was home. Than dad asked me where he was suppose to sleep. So I carefully walked him down the hall to his bedroom, (which had been his bedroom for years), and when he walked inside he asked me if I had anything for him to wear. I opened his dresser and took out his pajamas. I asked him if I could help him get dressed and he yelled NO! So I politely left his room, and quietly shut his door. I waited about ten minutes before I knocked on his door to see if he was alright or if I could help him. He did not answer. I walked in and found him with his pajama top on sitting and starring out into space. I called out his name but got no response. I took his hands and asked him to squeeze them, but still no response. His pupils were constricted and he just starred. I kept talking to him, holding his hands when all of a sudden, he made eye contact, and smiled. Than he told me he didn't know what he was suppose to do. He let me help him put his pajamas on and tuck him into bed. I kissed him goodnight, and he smiled and told me I was kind.

I think dad had a TIA which is an Transient Ischemic Attack. This is when the blood supply to part of the brain is briefly interrupted. It is also know as a warning stroke or a mini stroke with no lasting damage. I am sure that this event did not help his Alzheimer's, but he did not have any stroke like symptoms or lasting damages from this event. I am probably lucky to have seen it. I was only out of his room for ten minutes, so imagine how many times something like this can happen and not be witnessed. I hope this helps. May God bless you and your loved one with this awful disease.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Happy Sunday, and what a great way to start the week but by going to church. My job puts me on a rotating schedule so I get to have Sundays off for six weeks and than work for three. To me when I don't get to go to church the weeks seem to blend together. But the weeks I get to go to church, each week is new and refreshing.

While taking care of my father in law, I made it a habit of taking him to church. He was Catholic but I am Baptist, so I brought him to a Baptist Church. When I first moved in I was not sure as to how confused he was. We were on a learning curve, learning about each other. I had found his routine was to have coffee in the morning and than snooze in his chair. It was our first Sunday morning, when dad got up and I gave him his coffee, I told him we were going to church. He seemed to be agreeable. I had his clothes laid out on his bed. I waited for him to get ready, and when he came out of his bedroom, he had changed his shirt, but not his pants. The carpet was wet by the side of his bed, and smelled like urine. I asked him why he didn't change his pants and he told me he didn't see any. We could not find his shoes, so I put his slippers on him. I figured that God didn't care if he smelt a little and Dad seemed so thankful to be at church.

Difficulty performing familiar tasks is a symptom of Alzheimer's. Dad was having difficulty with finding his pants, putting them on, and finding the restroom.

Maybe if you have had a similar situation you may want to share. Write me. I am trying to share personal information so that you may know that you are not alone. Remember that to the world you are but one person, but to that one person, you are their world.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretaker Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING

As a caregiver we feel like we can take on the world. We are take charge people and don't think we need any help. I remember moving in my father in laws house, and slowly changing a few little things so I could feel comfortable and feel at home. I took out his dishes and put in mine. I rearranged the kitchen cabinets. Dad would watch me with a curious look on his face. At the same time I tried to respect his space, like for instance he didn't like to have the window shades open, so for him I would leave them closed.

It didn't take long before I was getting so exhausted. Watching dad was a 24 hr - 7 day a week job. He didn't sleep much, so I was constantly up in the middle of the night. I would than try my hardest to keep him on a schedule. Bath and shaving before breakfast. He liked his food so I would always have something like waffles and hash browns for him with is coffee. Than when he would nap I would scamper through the house making the beds, doing the dishes and cleaning the bath rooms. Soon it would be lunch and he would eat a big lunch and than would want to wonder. It took a lot of my energy just to make sure he would not get hurt. Of course the bewitching hour would come and sun downers would appear and I would really be busy. I thought I could do all of this myself, so what a surprise when I discovered I did need help.

Respite care is very important. I found a adult day care and after I called them and they came over to interview dad, I had him go a couple times a week for 4 hrs. But I soon discovered that it was not enough. I was working part time on the ambulance 2 nights a week and I was really getting tired between being up all night for work and being up a lot of the night for dad. So I eventually put dad in the adult day care for five days a week, 4 hours a day. What a difference I found getting that break each day. It felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders for those 4 hours. I could sleep, or read, or even spend time with my family.


So this blog is to tell you how important it is to get respite care. You can do it by finding an adult day care like I did, or you can find a nursing home that will take your loved one for a weekend to give you a well deserved rest, or even a family member to stay with your loved one so you can get a break. If you don't get your break, and you are really warn out, how are you really going to take care of someone else. So please take care of your self so you can take care of your loved one.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Problems with language is a major sign of Alzheimer's. People with Alzheimer's have trouble following a conversation. They struggle with vocabulary, or finding the right words. As the disease progresses they tend to repeat what they have said or what they have heard over and over again.

There were many times when Jimmy, Regina and I would be sitting around dad's kitchen table having a conversation, and Dad would be listening to us. He would be concentrating intently on what Jimmy would be saying, and than would move his hands and ask questions like he understood what we were saying. He was so serious, trying so hard to join in our conversation.

I remember the time when we were watching a segment on TV about a mother who was praying for her son and his future to be tuned with God. Dad was having trouble comprehending what was going on and told me it was about education and being poor and not having enough money for a good education.

As his disease progressed towards the last stages, he would have times he would be very talkative, but he would repeat the same phrase over and over again. It might be, Mother Mary,
or something he had seen on TV, like Nick, from Nick at Night.

Being a care giver is a very frustrating job. I know you feel all alone. It seems like the world has stopped. The days, weeks, and months carry on, yet your world, as you once had known it has stopped. You are not alone. It is important to vent to someone, so that you can be in tune with your daily job of taking care of your Alzheimer's loved one. Please look for a good support group. If you go on to Alzheimer's Association, which is www.alz.org and on the top right hand corner it says find us anywhere. Hit GO and you can search by state. A map shows up and you can hit your state. Than it tells you the name of a Chapter and you hit that. Scroll down and hit support groups. You will find support group listings. I hope this helps. Please this is very important for you and your loved one. You can get ideas from the other members of the group and you can give input which may help another care giver. I hope someone is reading this and I am helping you.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG

I just came from a call to a nursing home for a 86 yr old female with history of dementia and aphasia. Was told this patients H&H on Dec 23 was 11.3 and today her H&H is 8.5. The doctor at the nursing home wants to rule out a GI bleed. I am writing this to let you see what it is like for this patient with dementia / Alzheimer's.

We got on scene to find this patient in PT/OT at the nursing home. She has no idea what is going on and when my partner wants her to come on to our gurney she refuses. So the nursing aids help and transfer her to our gurney. I am with the nurse taking a report and I don't see what is going on. Finally my partner comes up to me and tells me that the patient does not want him to touch her. I thank God that he gave me such love and compassion for elderly people. I find her on the gurney scared. I take her hands in mine and get to her level looking at her in her eyes to get her attention. She is not sure at first she wants to talk to me but after my kiss on her check she starts to trust me. She can tell me her name but has no idea how old she is or what her birthday is. I ask her if she knows what is going on, and she tells me no, and that she wants to go home. I reassure her that if she was not loved by her doctor we would not be here and that she needs to come to the hospital with us. I ask her if I can take her vitals and put on a pulse ox and she shakes her head yes. She is quiet while en route to the hospital but as we are reaching our destination we are told that this hospital is on divert and not taking ambulances right now. So we have to take her to a different hospital 15 minutes away. She is confused as I try to explain to her what is going on. As we get her to the hospital she quietly awaits to see what is next. My partner tries to take her temperature but she won't let him. We bring her to her room and two male nurse aids come in to take care of her. I remind them that she has dementia, and is frightened so to use gentle gloves with her. As I am finishing my paper work by the nurse station the two nurse aids come out frustrated telling me that she won't let them take off her blouse to put on a hospital gown and she is trying to hit them. So I go into the room, take her hands in mine and explain to her that I have to change her and ask the men to leave the room.

Remember the stages of Alzheimer's. Memory loss, difficulty with familiar tasks, confusion with time and place, trouble with vocabulary, with drawl from social activities, changes in mood and personality.

Now imagine how you would feel in this situation. First you are told to go to a hospital and don't understand why, yet really want to go. Next as you get to one that is across the street you find you are in the vehicle longer than it should be. Now some young men are trying to take off your clothes. Just put your self in her shoes.

Alzheimer's is just as scary for the patient as it is for the caregiver. Remember to have patience, and try to remember who they were before the disease took over their mind.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press an Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Yesterday at work it broke my heart as I was called for a 91 year old female whose blood pressure was falling 88/52. As we got to the nursing home they told me they took her blood pressure twice in an hour and her blood pressure kept falling. We found this frail, weak women lying in bed. I noticed something dark around her lips. I took a cloth and wet it, and dabbed it to her lips to see it was crusty and pussy. I was standing on her right side and asked her when was the last time she ate a meal. She just looked at me curiously and kept saying "what". We carefully sheet lifted her to our gurney and took her vitals. Now I was standing on the left side of her. I already kind of put her off to being with dementia, but I decided to ask a couple of other questions. To my surprise she told me her age, where she lived, even her social security number. We were relieved to see that her blood pressure was not low like I was told, but she was dehydrated, weak and frail. I decided to read her paper work and low and behold, this lovely lady was deaf in her right ear.

This brought me to a memory of my father in law. We had a party for him with a lot of his relatives. He was so cute, smiling, and saying hello to every one. One of his favorite things to say when you ask him, how he is feeling is, 'If I was feeling any better there would be two of me.' The next day my sister called me and said she thought that there was nothing wrong with my father in law. She said that he knew who she was. Very carefully I asked her if he ever called her by her first name. "No," she replied. "But we talked about the times when we met for lunch." I asked her if she brought it up or if he did. "Well I did," she answered." But he said he remembered." I made her think about the conversation and finally she agreed that all he did was agree with her.

That is one of the frustrating things about Alzheimer's. The person who has it can put on an act, and if you don't know better, you won't see what is wrong. One of the first things I did when I moved into my father in laws house was really talk to him and see what he knew and did not know. I asked him simple questions and I found out that he did know his name and his birthday. But he had no idea how old he was, had no idea who I was, only remembered two of his three children's names, and he did not know that we were in his house. I took out a photo album that I had made for my father and mother in law about four years earlier and we went through it. He did not recognize the people in the album and would ask me who they were. Although a couple of times he surprised me and recognized his wife. But than he asked me where she was. I had to explain to him that she already passed away. Than he asked me if they were happy together.

Alzheimer's stole his mind from him. It took his identity away. The man I once knew was gone. It is not fair. It is such a terrible disease. I do hope that we can find a cure soon. Alzheimer's starts with impaired memory, to impaired thoughts and speech, and finally to complete helplessness. Nerve cells die to areas of the brain that are vital to memory, and other mental abilities. The connections to the nerve cells are disrupted which affect memory, judgement and thinking.

I just wanted to share this with you. If you are going through something like this I want you to know that you are not alone. If you need to vent, ask questions or just want to talk, write me. I will try to help or just be a good listener. Remember life is a gift and family is very important.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press an Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

It felt so good yesterday to come home and sleep a few hours and than to lounge around in my pajamas and robe for the rest of the day. Jimmy made me a great meal, and than a warm bubble bath came excitedly to finish the day before bed. I hate when I am not feeling good. But I am so happy to be in my own home.

We moved into my father in laws house, when it was decided that his confusion was to much for my sister in law to handle. We quit our jobs, and found new ones by him. We wanted him to stay in his own comfortable environment, to know where he was, and not be scared. But as you know one of the signs of Alzheimer's is disorientation to time and place. The day we moved in, dad saw the big truck in his driveway and all the boxes we were taking out. As he would walk through his house, he would ask us why we were taking his things. Even after we showed him that inside the boxes was our stuff he was still confused.

We didn't live there for very long before he started asking us to take him home. He was very polite and would thank us for letting him live with us but he had to go and take care of things in his own house. This was hard to understand. But in time we figured it out. He had only lived in two houses his whole married life. The address of his first house kept coming to his mind and he wanted to go back. Jimmy did drive him there one day, and dad was really confused when he noticed that it did not look the same anymore. Than when Jimmy drove him back, he recognized this house. But each day was the same thing. He would say he wants to go home, and than when we would drive him around the block and back to this house he would say thank you for taking him back home.

I know how difficult it is taking care of a person with this awful disease called Alzheimer's. Sometimes you need to vent. I am here if you need to vent or just ask any questions. I know your heart is in the right place or you would not be taking care of your loved one. But it is not an easy job. God Bless You. You are an angel here on earth. Some day they will be gone, but your memories will last. When you are getting really frustrated take some respite time. Remember if you don't take care of your self, how are you going to take care of anyone else.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretaker Journal
Seaboard Press an Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOGGING:

Well as you might know I work on an Ambulance as my daily job. I prefer doing what is called GT (general transport). That means instead of going to car accidents I like going to nursing homes. I just have a soft heart for old people. But in dealing with that I also have people coughing on me, throwing up on me, and sneezing on me. So wouldn't you know it, last night in the middle of the night my body decided to get sick. You see, on an ambulance we work different kind of shifts. We work 24 hrs at a time. Why? Because you never know when someone is going to call us to help somebody. We have an apartment which we call a station to live in during that time. And after we clean our ambulance, apartment, and stock up we have time if permits to watch TV or sleep.

This last week of working I have had some pretty sick people to take care of. They have the flu, or common cold, and I am picking them up and bringing them to the hospital. Needless to say, in the middle of the night last night as I was taking a nap, I woke up with a sore throat. Feels like cotton in my throat, and coughing, and runny nose.

The poor Alzheimer's pt has no idea that they are sick. They don't complain, and you have to keep an eye on them to make sure that they are drinking fluids, and not running a fever. I remember with my father in law, watching him walk up and down the halls praying to Mother Mary. When I got him to the doctor I found out he was in a lot of pain. That he needed a new hip. But dad could not tell me that. He never complained of being in pain, he just walked slowly down the hall, holding on to the wall, praying.

You have to have a six sense when watching your loved one with Alzheimer's. You have to try and stay one step ahead of them, anticipating their wants and needs. It is not an easy job, but it is a wonderful compassionate job. Just remember that life is a gift and we need to make every second count. I am here if you need to talk to someone.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG

I don't really like coffee myself but I do enjoy the smell of it in the morning. When I first got married, we lived in the basement of my in-laws house where my father in law had built an apartment. One of the memories I have is the smell of coffee in the morning. Both my mother and father in law had to have their coffee to start their day. I am a morning person and would wake up in the morning very talkative, and alive. They liked it quiet in the morning, and when I would run upstairs to say hi, they would be sitting there waiting on their coffee and telling me it was to early to be talking. In time they got themselves a timer for their coffee pot so that the coffee would be made before they got up.

One of the major signs of Alzheimer's is difficult performing familiar tasks. My husband remembered one morning when he caught dad making coffee. Dad had coffee for over fifty years and definitely knew how to make it. But this one day dad did not change the grounds, and than he took the old cold coffee inside the pot and was pouring it back through. It just broke Jimmy's heart to see that.

As the disease got worse dad forgot how to turn on and off the TV set, and turn on and off the light switches. This is such a terrible disease. It is so hard to see a man that taught you so much about life, now not know how to make coffee, or turn on a light switch.

Being a caregiver is a very hard job. It hurts to see your loved one so incapable of doing every day things. Just remember to have patience with them. Show them that you love them, and don't criticise them.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press an Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG
Happy 2nd day of January. So the question is how many days will it be before you quit putting 2009 at the end of your dates and remember it is 2010.

Memory loss is one of the major signs we look for in Alzheimer's. I have a wonderful tune I like to remember, and I get so angry at myself when I can't remember it. It was sung to me when I was a teenager by a boyfriend named Greg. And although the infatuation left me about Greg the song stayed in my heart. It is called Mr Bojangles by The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band.

I know that when I have trouble remembering something I am always keeping in the back of my mind, ' Do I have Alzheimer's'.

Forgetting information is an early sign of Dementia. The person seems to forget more often and doesn't recall it later. They seem to forget important dates or events, and ask the same information over and over again. They have unexplainable confusion at home. They may have forgotten a conversation that you just had with them.

But remember that it is normal to forget things. What is not normal is the information not coming back to you later.

I often use to drive with my father in law to pick up Aunt Yolanda and Aunt Ann, and bring the three of them to a nursing home to see Aunt Betty. We would stay for about an hour and visit and than I would bring them to a restaurant for lunch. It was always such a lovely time, even though a lot of the time my father in law would fall asleep while we visited. I will never forget one time when I was driving home, and a truck passed us by. All of a sudden my father in law took his fist and hit the dash. I jumped and looked at him with frightened eyes. Then he looked at me with tears in his eyes and told me he wished he could still drive a semi. My heart broke. Did he know what was happening to him? It is hard to say. I can't put my feet in his shoes even though I tried. But it wasn't much after that when he asked me where we were going and why was he in the car.

Being a caregiver is a hard and compassionate job. No one will know what you are going through or how you feel. They will not understand when you feel hurt, or anxious, or even angry. Just remember that to the world you are just one person but to that one person you are their world. I hope this helps someone out there. I am here if you need to make any comments or have any questions. Happy New Year.

Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press an Imprint Of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com

ALZHEIMER'S BLOG

HAPPY NEW YEAR:
Well just like the rest of you, I have been busy today taking down our tree and putting away all the Christmas decorations. Saying good bye to last year will be easy. It has been real hard since my husband has not had a job for a year and I have been putting in so much overtime to make ends meet. But thank God I have a job.

As Jimmy and I were taking down the lights, I couldn't help but think about past Christmas's. The one that comes to my mind is the first one we ever had at this house. We moved here in sunny Arizona in Oct 2003. Dad could not remember anything about his life anymore, so we knew it was safe to move him with us. That November my daughter Jessica had got engaged at the Grand Canyon, right in front of us. But as life has it, at the same time my daughter Jennifer who was in the Army National Guard got her orders to go to Iran. We tried hard to make this a Christmas we wouldn't forget. So as dad sat on his favorite chair snoozing, we were all busy making Christmas happen. Jessica and Regina were busy decorating the yard, Jimmy was on the roof putting up lights, and Adias was putting up our little Christmas town. I decided that this year we would get a fake tree, (for the first time) and make it patriotic. I did it in all red, white and blue, with little flags and ornaments to match. It was a hard Christmas, for a couple of reasons. First I hated to see dad the way he was. I have so many memories of him playing Santa Clause. And of course I was scared knowing my baby was going to Iran. She was so brave, especially to her daughter. I must have shed a lot of tears that Christmas. But God is always watching us and that is always a comfort.

I know that there is a lot of people out there dealing with this terrible disease. I am going to try and blog this year, with the hopes of helping you deal with your loved one. To let see the good times and the bad times that we shared as a family. To let you know that you are not alone.
Sincerely,
Marie Fostino
Alzheimer's A Caretakers Journal
Seaboard Press An Imprint of James A Rock Pub., Co.
www.mariefostino.com